Dear Jaxon…. A letter to my unborn son

Jaxon Miles Bratz,

I can't believe that we are a week and a half away from your due date!  Momma and Daddy are so excited to meet you.  I'm sure from now until you are born will be the longest days of my life with so much anticipation built up.  Everything is prepared for your arrival, now we just wait.

The waiting gives me time to think and reflect back on how much can change in a person's life due to one thing.  That thing can simply be wrapped up into one word, LOVE.  You see, your daddy and I never imagined we'd ever be anxiously awaiting the arrival of a child of our own.  We never imagined as individuals that we'd settle down and get married either.  Nor did we ever imagine that we'd end up moving back to our hometown.  Yet here we are living in the town we grew up (for the most part, your daddy lived in NY for part of his childhood before moving a mile away from me).  It took your daddy some time to convince me to let him take me on a date, years actually, but it was all in God's timing and His timing was perfect.  Our first date, to Boston and New York, was beyond words but I knew that your daddy was unlike anyone else I'd ever met.  I knew he was the one God intended me to be with.  Our relationship fell into place with no reservations and no doubts.  After a year into our relationship daddy called your granddaddy from Afghanistan and asked if he approved for us to get married.  Of course granddaddy said that he wasn't giving me away but your daddy could gladly join our family. We were married while daddy was home for R&R from Afghanistan.  It was a small wedding in Nashville, TN, that's how we like to do things, even if it did upset some.  When we found out you would be coming into our lives, we were so excited and now we are anxiously awaiting your arrival.  Some days your daddy just looks at me and says he wished he could send me a picture of how life is now to my former self 5 years ago.  Love changed everything about the way we lived, saw life and looked at the future.  One day you too will see that love changes everything, even in your own life.

The first thing that your daddy said when I let him know that we were expecting was, "Please God don't let it be a girl."  Your daddy prayed hard for a little mister and he almost hit the roof (literally) the day he heard the words, "it's a boy."  Jaxon, your daddy loves you so much and he has big plans for you two.  He talks to you daily so I have no doubt that you will know exactly who he is on your birthday and you will already have a special bond.  Which is a good thing, because I'm not so sure he's going to share you once he gets his hands on you!  I can't wait to see you with your daddy.  He's awesome, which you will soon find out.  He has a heart of gold and will give his all in everything he does and you little one will be no exception to that.  

Your middle name, although not a family name, has so much meaning for me and your daddy.  You see, there were several thousand miles that separated us for years while he was in Afghanistan, but it drew us to one another.  We learned who each other was in ways that most spouses never get to.  We are thankful in that sense for the miles.  They drew us so close to each other and we proved that distance means nothing when someone means so much.  One day, we hope that you will keep in mind just what the Miles means and know that there was a lot of love behind the meaning of your name, it wasn't just a name we saw and liked.  Miles was part of our definition but we used it to make us stronger not pull us apart.  And you, Jaxon Miles, are making us even stronger than we could imagine and we still haven't met you.

As you grow older, I hope you have the patience with us that we will have to have with you as you learn about growing up and we learn about parenthood.  We are a little terrified that the hospital is actually going to send us home with you to raise but we are looking forward to the challenge.  

I can't wait to meet you my son!

Love - Momma